Posts belonging to Category Funny

8 things woman should avoid during the world cup 2010

This is a very important instruction guide to survival for the next month….

Do not change the channel  to Generations – he is watching Soccer!
Don’t ask about  Beckham  (he is not there) and no-one cares.
Support the same team as him……..please  its for your own safety.
Avoid moving in front of the screen ……..right now he feels he [...]

The difference between ‘potentially’ and ‘realistically

A young boy went up to his father and asked him,’Dad, what is the difference between ‘potentially’ and ‘realistically’?’
The father thought for a moment, then answered, ‘Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars.
Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million [...]

6 Management lessons you have to know!

This is a condensed management course with all you ever need to know!
Lesson 1:
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour
Before she says [...]

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns

Thanx Mark for this one….

THE SPOILT UNDER-30 CROWD!!!

Last years matrics has never not known cellphones, TV, ipods, and all the mathingie-jigs of our 21st century world. So when Lanie send me this I had a really good chuckle!
If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their [...]

Avoid drinking water

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine.. And those who don’t.
As Ben Franklin said : In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is
freedom, in water there is bacteria.
In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the [...]

A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organisation

The spoon: A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organisation.
Last week, we took some friends to a new restaurant, ‘Steve’s Place,’ and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket.
It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I observed [...]

Nigella vs a Real Woman

1. Nigella’s Way
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips.
The Real Woman’s Way
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for goodness sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway.
2. Nigella’s Way
To keep potatoes from budding, [...]

Italien Pasta Diet

1.. You walk pasta da bakery.
2… You walka pasta da candy store.
3.. You walka pasta da Ice Cream shop.
4.. You walka pasta da table and fridge.
You will lose weight!
AND….
For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health.
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart [...]

Don’t argue with a woman, Full stop!

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance,anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Ranger in his boat.  He pulls up alongside the woman and says,
‘Good [...]